NOTE: You can use this pattern five minutes of meeting her, or over a cup of coffee or even dinner. This pattern can stand alone by itself or be integrated into a larger pattern. It's best to set it up by talking about how you ever notice that some things seem to take a long time, maybe hours, just seem to fly by? I think time is a funny thing ... like for example:
You: Have you ever felt an instantaneous connection with someone? (Point to yourself) Like maybe as you were there, LOOKING at him, and you started to LISTEN INTENTLY, it was like there was a cord of LIGHT (gesture from your solar plexus to hers) going from you to them? And as that cord began to GLOW, WITH THE WARMTH of that connection, maybe you were even able to IMAGINE A TIME IN YOUR FUTURE (gesture either to your left or to your right ... at this point it really doesn't matter), say six months from now, still FEELING THAT SENSE OF INCREDIBLE CONNECTION, and LOOKING BACK ON TODAY (point back to you) as having been the start of it?
You: See, I think it's so funny how some people can JUST DO
THAT and LET IT HAPPEN because for me it takes longer. But I do find that during the course of an evening, as you REALLY LISTEN to someone (point to yourself), and you START TO RECOGNIZE those values and qualities in them that you hold so dearly for yourself ... pause ... WITH ME that's when you can MAKE THAT CONNECTION and really FEEL THAT GROWING BOND. I mean can you FEEL THAT (reach out and touch) is an incredible experience to have?
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To do this successfully you need to build a clear path of action by using tools if necessary. These tools would be facts, evidence and stories which you know they can relate to. Plus you always want to have their best interests at heart, in other words, you know what is good for them