One of the things that I do early on is to give a woman a sense that there is "something more".
I may start off as being overly confident and tease her just like a good seducer would - but then I'll let her "discover" that I keep a journal... or drop a line about some random act of kindness that I just did... or mention something that I did for my mom recently ("I took my mom out for dinner last Valentines day")... a "soft" side.
And I just leave it at that... a one sentence hint about what I did or do, and then move on to the next topic as if I don't really want to talk about it.
If they don't ask about it, you can bet they're thinking about it and will bring it up later.
If they do ask about it - I may mention a little more and then say, "It's not really a big deal... it's just me." And then she begins to find out what a great guy you are... and humble to because you don't talk about it much.
I call this technique of mine "Baiting". Because it's what you offer to hook them in.
You put on your bedroom eyes and sexual smile, and stares into her eyes. She looks up occasionally and smiles at you nervously. You're leaning forward on your elbows, head in hands. You reach slowly to her neck and pull her necklace from between her cleavage.
Can you feel the vibe here?
I know there's been times I've felt it too and I've tried to put my finger on what it is that makes this possible. Now keep in mind that a major portion of seduction is psychological, but there is also a physical element.
Part of what makes Sexual Rapport possible is a basic unspoken understanding. The understanding is that Sex is going to happen and that it is inevitable. Now a man can project this sexual rapport so convincingly that it draws a woman in.
Now how do you know that Sexual Rapport is present? Well, that's like trying to describe the wind or the ripples on the surface of a pond. All you can do is describe the effects and signs that the wind is there or describe the ripples on the surface of the pond knowing that the deeper currents are creating them. The underlying processes are driven by the unspoken understanding, the assumption, and the "vibe" when you know that it's on.
There are also environmental cues to accelerate the "vibe". These include soft music, flickering candlelight, the sound of flowing water, dim lights, and food.
Here are some of the physical cues that show that this Rapport is present and also be aware that this Sexual Rapport can be modeled as well. In other words, imagine that the ripples on the surface of a pond actually create the deeper currents. Mind blowing huh? But in the realm of Rapport and human interaction, this is how it can work.
• Body posture: stretched out, laying back relaxed, stretching arms, taking up a lot of space
• Eyebrow flash combined with a smile "coy glance," an expression combining a half-smile and lowered eyes
• Signs from a woman: neck presentation. The woman's head tilted sideways Occasionally the woman may stroke her exposed neck area with her fingers
• Smiling Mid-Game
• face to face, eyebrow flash, whisper
• Some body contact, hand hold (brief)
• Sometimes "playing with" an object, called object caress. For example, keys or rings are often fondled., caress (face/hair)
• Stroking the thigh and inner leg, caress (leg) caress (arm), caress (torso), and caress (back)
• Body posture- Lean forward/back
• "accidental" breast touch/brush occurred when brief body contact (less than 5 seconds)
• Knee touch the legs may be brought into contact with the man's legs so that the knees touch, one another while seated
• Thigh touch, seated side by side
• Foot to foot may result in the woman moving her foot so that it rests on top of the man's foot
• Gestures- shoulder hug: partially flexed arm was draped on and around another person's shoulder
• Lateral body contact may be similar to shoulder hug except that the woman moves under the man's arm so that his arm is draped around her shoulders rather than vice versa
• Frontal body contact occurs when the chest and thighs of the woman rests against the chest and thighs of the man
• Play, these behaviors consist of one pinching the other, tickling, sticking out their tongue, of approaching from behind covering the eyes
• Whole body movement: Parade consists of the woman walking across the room, perhaps on her way to the bar or the restroom. Yet rather than maintaining a relaxed attitude, the woman exaggerates the swaying motion of her hips. Her stomach is held in and her back is arched so that her breasts are pushed out; her head is held high
• Dancing behavior is one of the most frequently seen signals. It's called the solitary dance because, while seated or standing, the woman moves her body in time to the music.
• In this stage, body contact predominates including massage, caressing, stroking hair, lips
• Voices are low and subdued, talking slows and may stop altogether
• Eyes may close and kinesthetic stimulation may predominate
So how can it be useful to know where you're at in the "Courtship stages"? First of all, I don't believe that every woman will fit into these patterns, but it helps to know the patterns that most women will generally fall into, so that you know how to adjust your approach and have a general idea of where you're at in the process.
According to Evolutionary Psychology, women give certain signals and "sexual cues" to men that invite an approach. In fact according to social scientist Givens there are four phases of courtship. And he indicates that it is often the female who controls interaction in these early phases. Early Game is based on Attraction, Mid Game is based on Comfort and Rapport, and End Game is based on Sexual arousal.
1) Attention phase-attraction
The essence is of this phase is ambivalence. Female behaviors during this stage may include primping, object caressing, and glancing at and then away from the male.
2) Recognition phase-attraction
Female behaviors may include head cocking, pouting, primping, eyebrow flashing and smiling.
3) Interaction stage-comfort and rapport
In this stage, conversation is initiated and the female may appear highly animated, excited, laughing, smiling, with frequent gesturing.
4) Sexual arousal phase
Touching gestures are exchanged. Couples may hold hands, caress, hug, or kiss. In addition, there are certain "steps" that are commonly predictable in a male/female sexual interaction. A social scientist named Morris suggested that there were 12 steps that couples in Western culture go through from initial contact through intimacy. He indicated that the steps have an order that usually is followed in female/male relationships. The steps are as follows:
1) eye to body
3) voice to voice,
4) hand to hand
5) arm to shoulder,
6) arm to waist
7) mouth to mouth
8) hand to head
9) hand to body
10) mouth to breast
11) hand to genitals
12) genitals to genitals or mouth to genitals Now if you skips steps or fail to respond to a step you could be seen as fast or slow. But also keep in mind that not every woman follows this rule. For example, some women have hang-ups in certain areas like kissing. Don't let a block in a certain part of this sequence stop you from progressing to or at least testing the next one. You may even find your own "bridging techniques" to move from one step to the next. The point is to realize what sequence works for you and to be able to flow from one step to the next. Also, have the flexibility to take what a woman offers you and to use that to gain the momentum to take it to the next step.
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