We have talked about how to reframe chick tests and chick frames. By now you are probably starting to realize how powerful reframing can be for taking back control of the frame. Yet, there is still an equally--if not more powerful-way of taking back control of the frame.
This other way is outframing. Outframing is to literally create a larger frame around the frame of her chick test or chick frame. How do we do this? WelI, we already touched on this. Remember the example l gave in the last section? Okay, if you don't, her it is again:
"If she says, 'Are you trying to pick up on me' you could respond by saying, 'is that your way of showing that your interested in somebody or just your standard M.O. for picking up sexy men?'"
Remember how l said that this is not just a reframe but an outframe because l created a larger frame around her chick test frame? Put in simpler words, I am assigning an underlying meaning to chick test or chick frame. Another way of putting it would be that l am judging or chick testing her chick test or chick frame.
Let's look some ways of outframing. Moving forward.
Bad Intentions framing:
This is similar to the Pushing & Pulling tactic where we give them a guilty conscience. With this tactic we are outframing their chick test or chick frame by defining the underlying meaning of the chick test or chick frame as being about their bad intentions.
Let's look at an example:
Let's say a woman chick tests you with: "are you trying to pick up on me?" We can use bad intentions framing by saying:
"You are just saying that to try to get into my pants, pervert. But that is not going to work on me, I need more foreplay."
Let's look at some other types of outframing. Undesirable attributes framing:
When l am being chick tested or framed, I will turn it around by accusing them of subscribing to values or having attributes that are undesirable. This works great!
Let's look at a couple examples of this.
This one l came up with about a week ago. But before l give it to you, let me give you some background on how l came up with it. I hang out at a lot of trendy Hollywood nightclubs. One thing that l have realized about these clubs is that there are gold diggers abound. When a gold digger asks a man what he does for a living, she is CHICK TESTING him.
So, when a gold digger asks: "What do you do?"
I come back with: "I am not the guy who used to work with you at McDonalds. And if l bring you out with my friends, there is to be no talk of your career path at McDonalds...I wouldn't want you to embarrass me in front of my friends". Nice, I love this example.
Another great way to use this tactic is when a woman chick tests you by saying something such as: 'how old are you' or 'how tall are you'. I always shoot back with something along the lines of 'yes you are too old for me' (I say this because l am young and chicks are usually screening to see if l am too young for them. So if you are older, do the opposite) or 'you are too tall for me'. This works on so many levels.
One is that you are outframing her chick test or frame by making it about her having an attribute you don't like. You are qualifying her, not the other way around.
Another thing you are doing is taking her stupid judgmental chick logic and applying it back to her in an even more absurd humorous way--very powerful indeed.
Another way to use this tactic is to turn around their chick test or frame by accusing them of subscribing to values or having attributes that are undesirable, and then challenging them to refute your accusation. This is incorporating some of the stuff we covered in Chapter XV: Qualifying & Challenging. This works great.
Let's look at an example of this.
Let's take the chick test " nice stuff: how many other girls have you done this to?"
How can we use this tactic to outframe the test?
I might say: "I only do this on girls who seem adventurous because l am only friends with adventurous people. And you seemed adventurous. But maybe your not, maybe l was wrong about you. If that is the case, then this friendship will never work out."
Often times they will then tell me how adventurous they are. Now who is qualifying who? Who is the one who is the PRIZE in the interaction? Me.
This is the art of outframing their chick test or chick frame in virtue of assigning a consequence to it.
Let's take the chick test 'are you trying to get into my pants'.
Here is one way we could outframe this using consequence framing.
"You are going to scare men away with that line. Keep it up, you won't even be able to get a date on the Internet."
Outframing is to literally create a larger frame around the frame of her chick test or chick frame. Three ways of doing this are bad intentions framing, undesirable attributes framing, and consequence framing.
Think of types of chick tests and chick frames that come up often in male/female interaction (a good start would be to think of ones that commonly come up in your own interactions with women).
Now think of some ways you can use the different types of outframing to inoculate common chick tests and chick frames.
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