It's very important to become aware if and when you are not as confident as you desire. If you're not as confident as you want, it's a direct consequence of running a non-confident process through your mind. One of the major steps in gaining more confidence is being aware of when you're lacking confidence. The reason for this is because you have to be aware of something before you can change it. When you're aware that you're not being confident, you can change it. It will no longer be a given that you're shy or tentative or whatever label you previously used to describe yourself.
As you become conscious of what you're doing inside your mind with respect to confidence, pay particular attention to how you're talking to yourself inside. If you have a limiting, negative internal voice with bad tonality nagging at you, I'm sure you naturally realize how that can instantly stop you dead in your tracks when you really want to go for it.
Like paying attention to how you talk to yourself inside, notice what sort of pictures you make inside your mind. When I was locked in my dungeon of shyness, whenever I wanted to go out and meet a woman, I would make a big picture of women rejecting me and laughing at me before I even said, "Hello." With me making those pictures in my mind, I was completely paralyzed with fear and took no action. Instead, I watched opportunity pass me by only to regret it every time. What you hear and see internally impacts how you feel. And how you feel ultimately frees you to take action or shackles you to hold you back.
If you want excellent feelings, you have to see and hear excellent things.
This is easy because you're in control of your own mental processes. Now understanding that you have control is very powerful because that means you can change them so, whenever you're acting shy, you realize that it's a process and you can change that process.
If you find yourself acting in a tentative or shy way, here is what to do: Interrupt The Process:
Imagine a police officer springing up inside your mind, holding a red stop sign and he shouts out in an authoritative tone as loud as he can, "STOP!" With this image that you hold in your mind, you'll find yourself immediately stopping that process.
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