Quick Start Guide to Dating Women
Because I spend so much time out of my week either at the office or at home, I've decided to start up online dating again. I really do not like online dating, simply because it takes so much time and effort, as opposed to club bar street game which is relatively fast and painless. However, I may as well put the time I have doing nothing to good use and try and get me some pussy.
When l talk about meeting women I am talking about doing cold approaches. This means approaching women who you have never met before and have not been introduced to you through a mutual friend. There are really two parts to cold approaches initiating and conversational opening.
A word of warning about personals - they will never get you the experience of actually approaching and getting the attention of the woman you want because a meeting arranged through personals simply skips this important phase. So although meeting women this way might feel easier initially, ultimately you will never learn the skills that really make the difference Is this too low for you Is it beneath you Hell no. Whether it's newspaper personals, telephone personals, video personals or Internet personals and chat rooms, they offer you excellent opportunities to meet a lot of women to practice your skills. A few more US-specific places and times to meet women. Speed Seduction newsletter, Ross Jeffries Restaurants with attached bars These places are often great Tuesday to Thursday nights, around 6 -8 30 PM. Especially upscale places, they cater to a professional crowd. Some VERY nice looking women looking to unwind after work. Also often these places serve as a meeting ground...
As the reader will by now have surmised, the deck used in Computer Dating is arranged in stay-stack order that is, the bottom half of the pack mirrors the order of the top half. The mate to the top card lies on the bottom, the mate to the card second from the top rests second from the bottom, and so on. At center the twenty-sixth and twenty-seventh cards are mates. Expressed as a formula, the stack looks like this
With every woman out there, no matter what amazing system for meeting women that you are trying to take advantage of mine or anyone else's. The dance of seduction invokes such deeply primordial sensations that it can't be completely manipulated with clever words and perfect attitudes alone. In other words, you could do everything I show you in this book absolutely perfectly to the letter and you could still get rejected once she catches a good sniff of your DNA and it turns out to be a mismatch Bottom line There's just no way to drain all the risk out of meeting women, no matter how good you ever become at it. There exist aspects of biology that are simply out of your control. Perhaps this is why women value the demonstration of the characteristic of risk taking in men so much. The more a man seems willing to risk harm to his ego (since he can never be sure how a woman will respond to his advances), the more flat-out impressive he appears to her.
It's important to understand that all of this psychobabble is only a prelude to the nuts and bolts of meeting women -- because no amount of technical training will do any good if the subconscious basis for your aberrant behaviors are not searched out, hunted down and stomped into submission by way of your own determined personal self-analysis. The things I've shown you were mostly dug out of my own fucked-up skull and
Try to re-frame your preconceived notions about meeting women. Think of flirting not as some frightening challenge but rather like a farmer planting seeds. Farmer John scatters his seed all around the field in the spring (sounds vaguely perverted, doesn't it ) never knowing how many or which particular ones will take root and sprout into big healthy plants. But some always do. Others die or fail to germinate. So what That's Life. Adopt this attitude and you'll be alright.
This fact of mating life gives you an important clue as to the proper way to conduct yourself around the women you find attractive. This is why every book out there on the subject of meeting women -- including this one -- keeps relentlessly hammering away at the notion of attitude, attitude, ATTITUDE Yes I know, you're fuckin' sick of it already. You don't have any natural confidence with women so you don't project this kind of sexy he-man attitude like all the tough guys, con artists and various other slick bastards out there. That's why they're out there scoring like crazy and you're home beating your meat. Well let's see if we can't begin to find an immediate work-around for this problem a genuine solution that will suit a non-aggressive male like yourself.
Remember, you are deeply ashamed to be displaying any sort of need for affection -- that's why meeting women is so difficult for you. But recall how I said that the only way to get beyond your shame is to go straight through it You've been trying to zig-zag your way around it for your entire miserable life and look where it's gotten you. Nowhere. Now do it my way
So, your homework is to go to the site (www.rateyourself.com), and put a picture of yourself up for a week. Then the next week, put up a picture of yourself with a completely different look, and so on. Whatever, Iook gets you the highest rating, is the Iook you want to have when meeting women.
And finally, the most important step of all Have Fun Central to all the difficulty that you've been having is the fact that fear and shame have turned the entire process of meeting women into a deadly serious burden for you. Once you learn to step away from all that toxic shame bullshit and discover how to achieve a more light-hearted approach towards everything, the game of seduction and romance returns to what it was always meant to be fun
Have you ever been totally fascinated with someone Like maybe as you were there, LOOKING at him, and you started to LISTEN CAREFULLY, it was like his voice just seemed to wrap itself around you, and the rest of your environment just disappeared, and your entire world, everything you saw, became what was right in front of you And anything he described, you found that you could just PICTURE IT CLEARLY So you know, if he were talk about a romantic walk, on a moonlit beach, with your perfect partner, you could SEE YOURSELF there with him, just enjoying what that would be like
I've also been approached by Double Your Dating to do a review of their eBook, which I plan on doing sometime in January. I'll probably do reviews of all the major seduction products as well, including SS, which will be as honest as I can make it now that I don't have to worry about pissing Ross off anymore. Before I was trying not to do anything to overtly criticize Ross's products because I really didn't want his business to be affected (even though I honestly doubt the 3 people reading this website would affect anything of Ross's, lol), but now that Ross has told be where I can shove it, I guess I don't have to censor my opinions anymore. Though I will say that I'll probably be looking at SS as an over-all system rather than at individual products, so there will be plenty of good to go with the bad, just as there are in all the products out there.
How do we do this There are many ways out there. All the systems are in a way designed to do this in certain respects. Mystery Method is about escapism, wowing others with entertaining stories and getting them wrapped up in your charisma. Speed Seduction is about leading their imagination and making them think about all the things they'd rather be doing. Double Your Dating is about interrupting their reality and sucking them into yours. We use all sorts of tools, from talking about childhood fantasies, to using time distortion and false time constraints, to playing upon gender roles, to using preplanned routines to wow them.
We had most of the rules understood, so we set out to meet women. However, she was a total AFC when it came to meeting women in person. She can wrap men around her little finger, but when it comes to women, she has all the classic restraints, such as What if she doesn't like me or She will think I am hitting on her. I used hypnosis to tell her while she was in trance that she was confident around women. That created a slight improvement, but basically, simply telling someone what they are to be just doesn't work. I suggested that meeting women in person is a much better idea than the Internet. She was still unable to do cold walkups on her own. She knows that I talk to women everywhere I go, so she said If you were to find a woman for us, that would really turn me on I said that it may require that I spend some time with the woman before being able to warm her up to the idea of also including my girlfriend. She retracted that idea.
For those of you who might not know, cocky funny is the primary theory behind David DeAngelo's Double Your Dating material. His theory is that by projecting a cocky attitude while being funny, you can up your success with attracting women. I know Mystery likes to say he disagrees with this in a slight way, because he thinks it should be more cocky playful than cocky funny. However, I tend to disagree with both. I believe that ALL COCKY can be much more powerful.
The trick is to know exactly what the hell you should be looking for. This is where a lot of guys go wrong -- even guys who are otherwise skilled at meeting women. Ever notice how a lot of them keeping skipping from one girl to the next It ain't always because they're so enamored of the chase either it's because they keep picking the wrong women to have relationships with. After discovering just what lousy girlfriends they make, Romeo has no choice but to dump her and start hunting for a new one. If you like that sort of thing, okay you can use the information in this book to give you an edge to become a serious 'player'. But there will come a time when you find that the hunt and chase has become a lot of tiresome bullshit too, and you'll just want to just settle down with one good woman. To find her you'll have to know what to look for and how to read the 'early warning signals' to know if you've got a keeper or not.
Finally, a word about being appropriate. If you use the techniques for meeting women that I'm going to be outlining in the next chapter, you'll be faced with asking her out for a date at some logical point in your conversation. A logical (appropriate) moment. In other words, she'll be expecting you to ask the question, and thus will be far
First, DON'T PLACE A PERSONAL AD Now, I know I seem like I'm contradicting myself here, but please bear with me, because I'm not If you place a personal ad just like every other guy on the singles page of your local paper, you aren't going to attract the attention that you need Remember, ATTRACTING ATTENTION IS THE KEY TO MEETING WOMEN This is NOT a pitch for a 'self-help' book. This is NOT a pitch for a 'dating service' or one of those disgusting '976' numbers. It's not even a pitch for a seminar, an irresistible love potion, or a psychic astrological-past life love chart.
The curious thing is that there's doesn't seem to be any similar capability among males. We're programmed primarily to look for the visual signs of healthy child-bearing capability in the women we find attractive i.e., youthfulness, 0.7 hip-to-waist ratio, large breasts, etc. However, it's interesting to note that women, too, are programmed just like men to seek out the perfect partner for procreation, it's just that their sensory apparatus makes their detection methodology different. Since men use vision we can stand back and make all the assessments we need to make remotely from a distance. Women, though, need to get in close and actually get a whiff of a man. Imagine that This whole thing becomes especially complicated in modern life because clothing and deodorant soaps and colognes can interfere with her olfactory assessment, in effect masking our true genetic nature from her. This is why it might take several dates, and probably a casual encounter where she can get a sniff of...
You may find as you go through life that you will have many first dates and that if you're not impressed by the first date there won't be a second date. I believe that many men bore you because they come across as being one dimensional so they're drawn to the aesthetics, they're drawn to the face, the figure, the complexion, the hair.
It's a matter of opinion, but my own view is that this surely depends on Fred's character. If he really is decent, likeable, attentive etc., then you could say he is simply trying to ensure his good qualities shine through. If on the other hand, he is actually a sorry piece of time-wasting slime, then yes, his motives are deceptive and reprehensible. He deserves to endure cruel and unusual punishments - such as meeting women who play the same games.
Many people who read the rough draft of this book were upset by parts of it. Invariably, I'd hear the same complaint. These tactics you're teaching probably work really well. We thought the parts on power and confidence and on meeting women were great. But some of the actual seduction techniques are down right dishonest and unfair. They really don't give the woman any choice. Why don't you just leave them out of the book Then no one could possibly have any objections. Ok. Let's get the unfair charge out of the way. Yes, some, and I mean SOME of the seduction tactics in this book could easily be classified as unfair. And, truth to tell, I had some serious moral reservations about putting them in the book. However, unfair and fair are relative terms. If you and I are in a boxing match, and we are both fighting by the rules, then it is totally unfair for me to kick you in the nuts and poke you in the eyes. You are fighting by the rules, and so should I.
Unfortunately, Murphy's Law states that the best opportunities to meet women will only show up when you least expect it, like when you're out at the store buying a six pack. There's that hot chick standing in line next to you and you're doing your imitation of a stinking, unshaven bum today. Wonderful. Always seems to happen that way, SEVEN - Focus is Flattering. One sure way to knock any woman out of her defensive mode is to keep your attention absolutely focused on her. It's not advisable to be constantly breaking eye contact and looking around while you're out together, especially when she's talking. And checking out other women with a roving eye is tantamount to complete social suicide. If she so much as picks up a sniff that you're just another horn dog who thinks that all tail is the same , and that checking out the other trim in the room is no big deal, you're dead meat. Period. Your introductory conversations with her on first dates are all about her getting a sense of who you...
You are about to learn some very effective methods for meeting women. While all of them are effective, some of them might not be right for you to use in an overall sense. If, for example, you need to work on being more direct, then using some of the trickier methods that rely on getting a woman's attention via some kind of ploy might hurt you in the long run. Use your own best judgment and try to think long term. Your local restaurant or bar's happy hour is a great place to meet women. They go there to relax and unwind after work, and that means alcohol consumption, and plenty of it. So, you already have one strike in your favor, because their inhibitions are going to be a lot less than normal. The taking a survey method works better in this setting than in a singles bar, as women are, as I said, less suspicious. You're probably better off saying that you are writing a book for men and you are working on a chapter on bad lines. Ask the women you meet to tell you the worst pick-up...
The thing is, people like Mystery, Tyler, Papa, and Swinggcat don't have to worry about a lot of this stuff. These guys make a living off of pick-up and seduction. They get PAID to do it. They are able to travel the world, sleep in until 3 pm, and adjust their lives around meeting women. People like me -- I'm currently unable to do that. As it is right now, I can't even go out 4 times a week like most guys. My current schedule has me waking up at 5 am, going to work until 4 pm, getting home at 5 pm, and work at various projects and chores until it's time to go to bed at 10 pm. If any of you know anything about the bar club scene, you'll know that on weekdays things don't usually get going until 11 pm, so even if I was to go out around 8 or 9, nothing would be happening. When I look at people like Mystery and Swinggcat, I become jealous of the freedom they have to get good at this stuff. I know some people sarge at work, but that's something I refuse to do (mostly because there are no...
This is a funny little side effect to meeting women, and because of it, my eyes were opened to something. It's a dirty little secret, yet one that is so obvious I am surprised that I did not see it before. It is very easy to befriend women, because when you make it clear you do not want to have sex with them, they can feel safe with you and allow you to mess up around them in practicing your dating skills. Not only that, but being around women will teach you SO MUCH about how to pick them up, your game will rapidly increase.
When meeting girls you already know, shaking hands might seem strange, so giving some sort of a hug is the way to go. You don't need to fall all over her to give her a hug (which depending on the situation might even make you look like a fool or a pervert or make her embarrassed instead of having her enjoy it too ), a hug can also be putting your arm around her waist or shoulders when standing to her left or right and pulling her closer for a moment, or taking her hand for a moment (but not shaking it), or her elbow, or arm etc. Daniel, ASF KINO on the arm hand as soon as you say hi to show her you are a sexual being.
Swinggcat has updated his website to a more professional look, as opposed to the minimalist version he had before. I like the new incarnation, because it looks like more thought was put into it, and it's a little less like the ''Double Your Dating'' style he had going before. It seems he's moving in a direction that's more his own and starting to carve a niche for himself. If you want to check out his new site, click here.
I talked to Papa the other day, who told me some very exciting news. According to him, Real Social Dynamics, the company Tyler Durden and Papa teach their popular in-field workshops through, is officially teaming up with David DeAngelo and Double Your Dating. It seems that they've been given permission by David D to teach officially sanctioned in-field workshops after Double Your Dating seminars, which David will help to promote to his students.
Now who is this book for This book is for anyone who wants to improve their Game . If you're a Salesman, Marketer, Actor, Entertainer, Politician, Lawyer, Doctor, Public Speaker, Teacher - then your people skills are vital - read on. If you're in the Dating Game , then you can use this book to take it to a whole new level -read on. If you want to form a deep connection with someone, or with groups of people then read on.
Okay, so far you know what you want, you know where to find it, you know what image will help you get what you want, and you've tailored your image to that. Now comes the most important step to perform before going out to meet women. I am a big fan of the power of belief. I think that if someone believes they can accomplish something, they will. The same is true when it comes to meeting women. One thing I will do before I go out to meet women is look in the mirror and psyche myself up. I learned to do this before sporting events, as most athletes do. The difference between a good athlete and a great athlete is his belief in his ability to win. So I'll look in the mirror and say things like
Bet you never thought of this one, huh Believe it or not, hotels are amazing places to meet women. Now, I'm not talking about your local Motel Six, I'm talking about the major hotels in your area. The kind that host events and cater to vacationers and the like. These places will usually have bars, restaurants, and poolside areas. Four and Five star hotels are the best for this. Sometimes you'll even find locals who like to go to the hotels because it's a more laid back atmosphere than your typical bar or club. Indeed, the atmosphere at these types of hotels is fantastic, and very conducive to meeting women.
Community colleges are especially good, because for some reason the women at community colleges are just easier than women at expensive colleges. Hanging out on campus, in the library, student union, cafeteria, etc. can wield great results. If you're young enough, you can pretend to be a student. If you're older, you can say that you used to go to this school and you were just re-visiting the campus. Of course, you could also always sign up for classes (such as extension classes or evening classes) and meet women that way. Places like this are particularly conducive to meeting women because the shared lifestyle and concerns of students and the informal atmosphere make it easy to initiate conversation with each other. You have a great deal in common simply by being students at the same school and don't need to struggle to find topics of mutual interest to talk about.
We spend most of our lives at work, so to eliminate the workplace as a venue to meet women is irrational. But in this day and age, you have to be very careful about pursuing women at work due to legal concerns, such as sexual harassment. Not only that, but you must also consider the ramifications of starting an office romance that ends badly, and the working environment you'll have to endure thereafter. I normally don't recommend meeting women at work, but then again, why limit yourself Just be smart about it. Try not to pursue women you are in a superior position to (as in, you're her boss), and try to avoid women you work with directly on a day-to-day basis. At work, meeting women is usually best done in certain areas. The coffee machine or break room are always good places to meet women. Sometimes, the water cooler can be the best place to chat up the occasional girl. If your company has a cafeteria, that can be a great place to not only meet women, but have mini- office lunch...
In today's modern age, where everyone is connected by computers, the Internet has sprung up as a major venue to meet women. Everywhere you look, a new dating website has sprung up promising you love and romance. If you're into alternative stuff, like bondage, S&M, or other fetish stuff, there are dating sites that are for people like that too. Believe it or not, there are even dating sites for chubby chasers, or men who are into large women, that have become quite popular on the internet. But outside the dating websites, there are other options available too. Chat rooms can be great places to meet women, but you have to be diligent about making sure 1.) the woman is really a woman (there are actually men who like to pretend to be women online. Creepy), and 2.) they are attractive and worth your time. The best way to make sure of this is to have a webcam on your computer and only interact with others who have webcams. Of course, this limits your choices because most people don't have...
Effect The plot is similar to that of Computer Dating The deck is shuffled, then cut into two even piles. A spectator is offered a selection of either half. He cuts this packet once or several times, until he is satisfied that the cards at top and face are random ones. He is then given the choice of either card and told to place it in his pocket while the performer turns away. The spectator drops his packet onto the rest of the deck and buries it by cutting the cards. Method The stay-stack is again responsible for the location of the mate to the spectator's selection but the method of identification is entirely different from that used in Computer Dating . Give the stay-stacked pack a faro shuffle or two and divide it at center (between the centered pair of mates). As you do this, glimpse the bottom cards of both halves and remember them. You needn't remember suits, just values and colors for example, red ace, black seven. Don't separate the halves just yet. With your left...
We've been doing the long-distance dating thing for about four months now and she's always talking about how she wants to marry me. As far as calling and emailing me, she is completely consistent. I fly to see her and she flies to see me once a month. Once she finishes the program, our goal is to go to graduate school in the same city. In other words, things are going fine between us, but I have two concerns about our relationship.
Listen, I know some of you might be thinking this is unethical, but even if you're not really a kinesthetic or an auditory thinker, there's no harm in modifying your words in order to establish a groundwork of connectedness with a woman that you can build on later. Remember, when meeting women that 2 minute first impression has to be killer Almost all really great looking women are involved with some guy most of the time, but not all of them seriously. And that's the important key to seducing great looking women you must not be put off by the fact that she could be involved with someone else because they're usually ALL involved with someone else Attractive women don't spend a great deal of their time floundering around between relationships (like us nerds). Instead they are often in some kind of relationship, even if it's just a casual dating deal, always testing to see if this guy's the 'one'. A beautiful woman's dating and mating dilemma does not consist of finding someone -- anyone...
For the sake of meeting women, you must learn how to become agreeable in a non-kiss ass way that will serve to create an immediate sense of rapport and likability. If you're succeeding, it should be easy to tell from the body language signals. In a few minutes I'll give you a list of what to watch out for, but let's have a look at the theory first.
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