Likeability Blueprint

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When you tell stories using these three things, you'll notice people watching you with rapt attention, hanging on your every word!

Let's go into detail.

Confidence: What I mean by confidence in this respect is different from what we talked about in the chapter The Art Of Confidence. When you tell a story with confidence, you tell it in such a way as to communicate you know exactly where it's going. There's a point to the story, and you know what it is, and you're in the process of communicating that point to others. You're not speaking in a wishy-washy, scared way, and you're not meandering as you tell the story, getting side-tracked by irrelevant storylines. You're telling your story in such a way where it moves forward smoothly in a strong direction.

When stories are told with confidence, people will sit back and go along with it. When you do not know where you're going with a story, you will lose your audience.

Conviction: This is where you communicate to your audience that you believe your story. Often times, people may find what you're telling them hard to believe. They'll often ask questions because they're either genuinely interested in what you're talking about, or they're testing to see if what you're telling them really happened. When you speak with conviction, you know your story backwards and forwards. You know the answers to any question that may arise. You know every little detail there is, so that when you tell your story, those listening to it will believe in what you're saying just as much as you do!

Energy: Energy is about how you tell your story. It's the energy in your voice, it's how your eyes light up at certain points, it's when you pause for dramatic effect, it's your facial expressions, your arm gestures, it's about how much you get wrapped up in your own story and what energy you communicate to other people. A story told with little or no energy is boring to listen to, because it lacks any sense of excitement, humor, or purpose. A story told with a great deal of energy is easy to get wrapped up in and can capture the imagination of anyone who's listening to it.

When you combine these three elements, you are able to tell powerful, exciting stories no matter what they're about. When a person displays these three elements when they're speaking, some people call it "charisma."

Look at films of some of the most charismatic world leaders, and you'll always see these three elements present when they address their audience. When President Kennedy gave a speech, he spoke with confidence. When President Regan gave a speech, he spoke with conviction. When Hitler gave a speech, he spoke with energy. You'll see all three elements in the speeches of these men, and when you do, you'll understand how they were able to lead and influence so many people.

Here's a little exercise for you to try out. Think of the most boring and mundane story you can, and then practice it in front of a mirror. Incorporate these three elements into how you tell the story and look at the difference. You may find yourself adding more and more details to the story to help you find how to place these elements into your technique, and that's okay. When it's all over, you'll see the difference.

Example: I woke up this morning and ate a bowl of cereal.

Boring story, huh? Now try telling it with Confidence, Conviction, and Energy, and see what happens.

Example: Man, I woke up this morning soooooo hungry! My alarm clock didn't go off, so I must have slept until noon, which is really, really late for me, but I was up all night watching a James Bond Marathon on TBS. So when I went to get something to eat, I found out my roommate had eaten all the cereal, and there was nothing left to eat in my place because we only have week-old Chinese food leftovers in the fridge (don't ask me why). So I went to my neighbor next door, and I guess she likes to sleep in late too because when she opened the door she was wearing this really skimpy nightgown! When I asked her if I could borrow some cereal, she totally thought it was a lame pick-up line or something and started coming onto me! Now, usually I'd be into it because my neighbor is an incredibly beautiful woman, but the thing is, I was so hungry I couldn't think straight! So here's this beautiful, scantily clad woman coming onto me, and all I can think about is Captain Crunch! Unbelievable, right? The thing is, though, she has a boyfriend and I don't mess around with girls who are in relationships, so I told her "No, I really just want some cereal. I'm really hungry!" So she invites me in to have breakfast with her, so we're sitting there, eating cereal, laughing about how she thought I came over to hit on her, when her boyfriend walks in and sees us sitting in our pajamas eating breakfast! He thinks we spent the night together and were having an affair! So we try to explain what happened and he looks like he's going to rip my throat out, so I go back to my apartment next door freaking out this guy's going to come by with a gun or something. But it turns out my neighbor explained everything to him and we laugh about it all the time now, so everything's cool. But that's why I always keep extra cereal in my bedroom!

Hell of a difference, right?

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The Power Of Charisma

The Power Of Charisma

You knowthere's something about you I like. I can't put my finger on it and it's not just the fact that you will download this ebook but there's something about you that makes you attractive.

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