An important thing to remember, particularly in the initial phase of seduction, is that seduction is an active process. It's not enough to call her after two or three days after the first date and then lower your guard.
The truth is that you cannot lower your guard, not even for a second because women - the majority, particularly in the initial phase of seduction - never stop testing you.
Some of them - in my opinion the most beautiful and sensual women, indeed those equipped with a considerable sex appeal - test men in an active and continuous manner during the whole duration of the relationship. For this reason, to lower your guard against the tests is a luxury you cannot afford if you want to succeed in the field of seduction, unless you want to live as beta men do.
In addition if you are in a MLTR (Multiple Long-Term Relationships) relationship with more than one woman, you have to be prepared to react in the right way to their tests for the whole duration of the relationships.
Once you are an expert, this will seem to you, little by little, even a pleasant game and you will even enjoy it.
Each time she says or does something - particularly during the initial phase of seduction and particularly before you have sex with her for the first time but also later in the relationship - if you want to keep the sexual attraction at a satisfactory level, you must get used to asking yourself, in your head, this question: "Is it a test?"
Remember that the tests of the woman are often unconscious phenomena. I have seduced women who do even realize this consciously themselves nevertheless most of them do the tests in an absolutely unconscious manner, because tests are intended for weeding out of the sexual game the weakest men and for choosing the strongest one.
To understand the meaning of the tests is not easy. You need a lot of practice and experience to become good in the area.
Once you can understand the tests and how to react in the right way, you will have in your hands an extremely efficient technique for seducing women because a woman can hardly resist the temptation of having sex with a man who knows how to react to her tests in the right way.
As a general rule I advise you to do this: in case you are not sure whether it is a test or not, behave and react as if it is a test anyway. If, for example, you react to something that wasn't a test as if it was, nothing negative happens. But if you fail to recognize a test and she interprets things in her way, her interest for you and her sexual interest undergoes an immediate drop.
For example, when you have arranged to meet, she always comes late and you are unsure whether she has work-related problems or whether it is a test. You'd better not rack your brains trying to understand it, behave as if it is a test and react in the appropriate way, which is:
"So, who do you think you are? Hasn't anybody taught you to be punctual?" (With smile)
"Next time you are late I will personally spank you.
Pleased to meet you. My name is de Sade, the Marquis De Sade."
Then smile and make her understand that you are serious.
If she complains, don't show guilty feelings, don't apologize: she is the one who is late. It's not you who has to apologize. This is of course just an example. Situations similar to the one just described are countless and you will learn to recognize them as you gain experience. Your non-verbal communications - tone of voice, facial expression -are also very important.
You have to learn to react to tests with some humor and a bit of sarcasm, sometimes - as in the case above - you have to show yourself as being a bit furious, all of which is done without too much aggressiveness and while acting naturally.
Excessive aggressiveness is a sign of weakness and results in the opposite outcome.
In case of uncertainty therefore, you had better always react as if it is a test. Indeed, for example, if she is late because of social or work related problems, why doesn't she apologize? If she were going to a meeting with a boss or with a friend, what would she do?
Would it be her custom to be late? Of course, she would not be late. By being late she is just testing your reaction: if you allow her to ill-treat you, she will start to consider you beta, that is, a male easy to control and weak and therefore a male to whom it is enough to give very little - maybe sex once a month or not even that - to make him do what she wants.
Therefore if you are in the initial phase of conquest or you are dealing with a very beautiful woman with a very strong sexual instinct, with great probability she behaves like this because at an instinctual level she is trying to determine if you have the balls.
An important exception to the above are psychologically disturbed women that you must learn to recognize - and efficiently remove from your social network - with the help of this book. Disturbed women do tests in a very different way than other women, but we will deal about this in another chapter devoted to them.
Let's therefore deepen our understanding of tests and how to react to them in an appropriate manner.
Imagine your having met a woman in a bar and having aroused her interest and she has given you her telephone number; she is very beautiful and is probably used to having plenty of men foaming at the mouth.
An important thing you must always remember is that a very beautiful woman is approached by men many, many times a day everyday.
The goal of these men is to have sex with her. A very beautiful woman has therefore at her disposal a "market" filled with buyers willing to "sell" themselves for a very low price or even for free.
If there weren't other reasons, just because of this reason, a beautiful woman is compelled to create selection criteria.
Indeed, she cannot go to have a coffee or go to bed with all the men who try to hit on her, even if she chooses the best ones, she would soon have her calendar so filled with dates that she couldn't do anything else.
For this and the other evolutionary reasons she is therefore used to discarding all men who show too much interest in and dependency on her, which are indeed signs of weakness and signs that the men in question are not Alpha and therefore genetically less perfect.
Certainly you, as experienced seducers, wait at least one week after the first date and then - to prove that you are a challenge and put her in a subservient position - when you call you tell her:
You: "Hi, how are you? I have just returned from the Canary Islands. I had a lot of fun! How is life in the city going?"
Her: "It's going very well! What a pleasure to hear from you. Listen, can you call back in about one hour? I am going to have a manicure right now!"
At this point, of course, you agree and call later. After one hour you call and the answering machine answers. You call one more time. And still the answering machine.
What do you do? Are you surprised? Upset? I am not. In general I expected this in advance; it is a test!
Women don't follow any moral rule when they test a man; particularly during the first phases of seduction they are extremely wild. In practice in the area of female tests the law of the jungle applies. She is conducting a typical feminine test on you: she tries, consciously or unconsciously to see how you react if she hides herself in a cave.
If you react by being subservient like: "Dear, please come out of the cave because I am dying for you!" you are doomed, you are putting yourself at the same level as that dozen drooling men that each day try to seduce her without any luck because they are insecure, filled with fear and subservient.
I know many men, who would fail already in this answering machine phase. Some of them would loose control and would leave an angry message with the answering machine; some of them would send desperate messages. Some others would call twenty times or so within a couple of days.
And she would amusingly listen to her answering machine: "Another insecure man! Let's discard him!" She can afford it. She is beautiful and she has at least a hundred men approaching her every week.
An expert seducer immediately realizes the nature of the test.
If I were in the same situation I would behave like this; I would leave already the first or at most the second time this message with her answering machine: "Hi! Obviously the manicurist has kidnapped you. My number is... See you later!"
After that: absolute silence and let at least one week or two!
In the meantime you have fun with other women if you want to, or devote yourself to your favorite hobbies. It depends on you. Your message is: "My value is superior to yours and to that of other men. I have an interesting and happy life. Come share it with me if you want to."
Actually the meaning of her test is to try to establish a value for herself which is superior to yours. Women are very good in giving themselves a high value. By reacting in the above manner you give to yourself a value even superior to hers.
Indeed she knows very well that you had to call after an hour. In such a situation we are in fact talking of an adult person behaving like a child.
The truth is that she is just testing you to see if you become subservient.
Women are very ingenious concerning the subservient position: they try anything to put you inside it but then they go to bed with men who don't allow them to do it.
I wait one more week after having left that message with the answering machine. I already know what the majority of women will do in this situation. Of course she will not call you. If she does, she puts herself in a subservient position and this makes her loose her power.
It's necessary to remember that women rarely behave this way in a conscious way -nevertheless, of course this possibility has also to be considered! In general women, however, behave like this because they are compelled by primordial instincts. With all your failed calls, she is in effect trying to understand if you are sure about yourself and therefore Alpha.
In addition, every woman I have seduced has always tried from the beginning of the relationship to discover how far she can control the relationship.
The system most frequently used by women for controlling a relationship is to try to put the man in a subservient mental state. In the above example she is trying to do just that.
If the man allows himself to be controlled and to be put in a subservient mental state, this causes a drop in her romantic and erotic interest with the speed of light: exactly the opposite of what you want to obtain with seduction.
In addition there is another thing you must know: with tests a woman may be buying time particularly when she is not sure about her own feelings and emotions. Therefore she hides herself in a cave; leave her there and put a nice piece of steaming meat in front of the entrance and wait until she comes out with her mouth watering.
Of course, at this point, the Alpha male has to think something up to have her come out of the cave.
Doing nothing is not enough and she knows it. She knows you have to force her out in order to seduce her. At this point, if she doesn't call me after a week, I call her again. I don't propose anything to her. I keep myself vague. For example, I say to her: "Hi! I am right now at the tennis club. I've just played a match. Listen, do you know that they are going to perform a play by X at theater X" and then I start talking about the theater in the same way as one of her female friends would do, I make her wait; of course, she expects me to suggest something to her.
At this point I start to use the tremendous power of Social proof (read the chapter about this subject: it is extremely important) and I start talking about other women. I start telling her of my last girlfriend X, who "was a wonderful woman, extremely sensual, interested in the theater and she was so smart that she understood everything about me and what I wanted" and so on. Not many women can resist to the power of Social proof.
Talk about your "ex-girlfriend" - it's not necessary to lie - naturally you had a girlfriend in the past. Ok, in case you had no girlfriend before then make up a story about one! - She immediately starts to feel a growing interest for you, while you tell her what a wonderful person your previous girlfriend was, how beautiful she was and so on.
There is nothing in the Universe that makes a woman's interest for you grow as much as the knowledge that other women want and desire you.
Naturally there are extreme cases: if I have to choose between loosing the possibility of seducing her and entering the subservient scheme, in general I prefer to loose her.
There are women - luckily they are rare - who prefer not to be in any relationship with you if you don't give them a chance to control you.
If you give them a chance to control you, the seduction starts off badly anyway and your relationship will be in any case unsatisfactory for both later on. It's better to start from the beginning in the right way.
There is, however, a technique you can use with the most difficult cases, but you'd better use it only when you are already expert:
The technique of the false weakness. If you realize that she doesn't come out of the cave, very likely she "sniffs" the danger related to the fact that she can't control you. In addition, most of the women feel that, in order to give you a green light, they must first feel that they are on "emotional connection" with you.
Look out! This is very important! As we have seen in the chapter about relationships, for seducing you have to establish emotional contact with her! By "emotional contact" women often mean "to tell about feelings and also weaknesses"
Some modern women have had so little contact with the world of men that in order to be seduced they must feel a bit as if they were in a relationship "with a woman."
In such a situation you can introduce in this phase a "false weakness", for example tell her you had a terrible day at work and that you would like to talk about it. But watch out! You must know how to use this technique! If you truly open up too much on weaknesses, you are again in a very negative situation from the seduction point of view. She will start to consider you, little by little or even right away, as a friend.
The value of this technique is that it diminishes for a moment the tension between sexes and she feels "at home" and comes out of the cave for the time necessary for you to seduce her; it's not, however, a technique for beginners.
Novices must in the beginning follow the rule: never be in any context which could be interpreted as subservient! The subservient scheme results in any case in the failure of the seduction.
For hopeless cases it's better to devote oneself to another beautiful woman rather than loose time with one who stays in the cave for God only knows what reasons connected with female logic.
I can assure you that if you enjoy doing value elicitation, you'll find the strangest and funniest reasons you could ever have imagined!
For example, once I tried for some weeks to seduce a very beautiful colored woman, who said she wanted to meet me but then she never came when we had arranged to meet.
At the beginning I rebuked her in a very tough way on her impoliteness. For some reason that way of dealing with it did not work in this particular case.
At a certain point I started to use the elicitation of values on her and the truth, which resulted in the following was this, she told me: "A girl can always find her Prince in her imagination."
She was waiting for her Prince in her imagination! And for this reason she never came out of the cave.
And she didn't even know me!
If I had had more time for her, I could have used value elicitation to better understand the characteristics of "her Prince" and then present myself as that Prince in her eyes, but because I was in a hurry in that period, I had to let her go.
Manipulation, lack of respect, inducing feelings of guilt: How to recognise them and how to react in the appropriate manner in order to increase the female's sexual desire
There are three issues about the female world that you must learn to recognize if you want to become an expert seducer:
2. Lack of respect.
1. Manipulation. Throughout history such feelings as integrity, respect and honor, have been for centuries the prerogative of men and their world. To keep them, duels and wars have been fought and blood has been shed.
Women have always been more concerned with the preservation of life and the expression of their emotions rather than with abstract principles. The preservation of life is for them more important than integrity. Manipulation on the part of the woman during the most primitive phases of the history of the planet was used so that she could get protection from that brutal and dangerous animal which was primitive man and to protect her children.
This instinctive method of accomplishing her goals still continues, even though there may well be no need for it anymore.
The majority of men do not recognize the weapons of the female, not even when their companion has used them on them for years.
Manipulation is a female way of reaching her own goals. In the woman's world it is also a way of communication, which does not necessarily have a negative meaning. The breaking down of doors and various other kinds of direct action, possibly even aggressive, is the male equivalent of manipulation.
The word "WE" is the central means of female manipulation. To make what is just her interest look like a common interest:
"Dear maybe tomorrow we'll go to buy that car that WE like very much" is the female equivalent of the male: "Dear, I like that car very much, I'll buy it tomorrow and then we go for a ride together."
In the first sentence there is an attempt of making the other do something "we"
In the second sentence "I" make a precise choice and then we communicate it to the other.
Learn to be on the look-out when you hear the word "WE" pronounced in the mouth of a woman that you want or have seduced.
Here we are interested in manipulation for a precise reason: manipulation is also a continuous "test" that the woman performs on the man to realize how far she can go with her own purposes with him. In the woman's world manipulation is not seen as immoral. It is just a way "to influence" the other. "To communicate one's own feelings", "share emotions", and so on.
It is very important for a seducer to recognize manipulation. Actually women behave as far as manipulation is concerned in the same manner as with all the other tests:
"Even though the woman uses manipulation to reach her own goals, she feels respect and erotic desire for a man who doesn't let her manipulate him."
Why? It's simple: how could a woman consider erotic and seductive a man who does whatever she wants to without him even realizing it? Impossible!
You can't have erotic feelings for a human being who doesn't command respect and is therefore so easily controllable! At the beginning of a relationship a woman when she is being influenced by a strong desire to have a baby can choose an easily controllable man, but after some time her sexual interest for that beta man will die down, with mathematical precision.
I also know some women who have gotten married to beta men, even though they were conscious from the beginning of the fact that they didn't feel any desire for their man.
In order to increase the sexual desire of a woman for you, you have therefore train yourself to:
1. Recognize attempts at manipulation.
2. React in an appropriate manner.
It's not easy to recognize attempts at manipulation.
According to my experience women exercise manipulation in a way that the majority of men don't even realize. If you are a normal guy who doesn't have experience with women yet, you'll have to train yourself hard in the field and the first goal must be to learn to recognize attempts at manipulation.
To recognize attempts at manipulation, when she says or does something you have to ask: "Is she trying to have me make a decision or take a particular direction? And if I were to agree, would be the decision I make or the direction I take be in my best interest?" If the answer you get inside your head is negative then practice saying to her the most erotic word you could say to a beautiful woman.
Exactly so: "No!" By saying that word if she tries to manipulate you, you show her you are Alpha and this makes her sexual interest towards you to rocket sky-high. Naturally if she tries to manipulate you to make you do something pleasant and which is convenient for you, it's not necessary to refuse, but in any case set a high price for your participation.
In any case the only appropriate way of reacting to attempts at manipulation is: not to allow yourself to be manipulated! Particularly if the consequence is something that goes against your interests!
One of the finest tests that women do is to try to manipulate you into doing something that goes against your best interest in order to see whether you can fight for yourself!
If you do as she says, you'll fail to react to the test in an appropriate manner and things will take a turn for the worse.
There is nothing that makes you loose the esteem and erotic interest of a woman more than doing exactly what she wants when she tries to manipulate you.
Many marriages fail because he, right back from the altar and often long before that, begins passively to satisfy her wishes and allows himself to be manipulated.
This puts out her sexual desire with the speed of light.
The sarcasm technique is what I call an attitude you can have and keep with women you want to seduce or that you have already seduced. In practice it's a matter of constantly calling her on her attempts at manipulation with humor and sarcasm every time she says or does something manipulative or shows you a lack of respect.
It's a basic attitude that you must learn to maintain with her in the right way. This attitude will get her into your bed very easily many times: women simply love it. For some reason they like to tell you bullshit and then observe how you call them on the bullshit without even believing a word of what they say.
The attitude to maintain is the same that you perhaps maintained at school with a younger classmate who always did stupid things or when you were a sergeant in the gunnery battalion and you had fun in teasing the new recruits.
Women love this kind of attitude with which you show certain superiority and with which you make fun of them when they try to manipulate you or when they show lack of respect for you.
While I was writing these lines I had on my knees a very beautiful blonde. She has just asked me for a towel to take to the shower this way: "Where is my towel? Give me a clean towel!" and I promptly replied: "Well, who taught you to talk this way? Next time ask in a polite way, otherwise you go and get a towel yourself!"
After that she told me that I had behaved brutally. To which I promptly replied: "No, it's you who behaved impolitely! And you even have the audacity to complain!" She smiled, hugged me.
The tighter I held on, the more excited she seemed. After that we made love in an unforgettable way.
Train yourself to react to attempts at manipulation like this:
She: "Dear, maybe tomorrow we'll go to buy that car that WE like so much."
He: "Oh yes? I don't remember of having said that I like that car. That car? Are you joking? Let's go for a walk now, my naughty little lady!"
He: "That WE like so much? You mean YOU like so much! Smart girl!" Then you tap her with an open hand, on her backside.
A man's task is to notice the manipulation contained in what a woman says and in the woman's attitude and reactions, depending on the situation, with:
Anyway, never act with violence or anger, because these are signs of weaknesses. If she tries to manipulate you in a way which includes also a lack of respect, you have to show yourself a bit pissed off, but without getting too upset.
Remember that woman's job in a relationship is to fight for control and man's job is never to allow her to take it.
Watch out, she will not stop so easily, she will try again many times and she will stop only when she notices that you are inflexible.
And the important thing is: show her that trying to manipulate you doesn't work. With sarcasm or humor you refuse to do as she wants.
As a rule she must be rewarded when she asks for things honestly and in a straightforward manner and she must be punished by refusal, sarcasm and humor if she tries to manipulate you.
Beware! She won't stop at the first attempt! You have to practice reacting firmly to prolonged attempts at manipulation on her part. The more she realizes that her attempts at manipulation can't affect you, the more she will feel interest, attraction and erotic feelings towards you.
2. The lack of respect is another test frequently used by women.
A smaller group of women is equipped with such strong and primitive instincts that they need to "feel" how the man overcomes their resistance before they can become interested in him.
The only logical and possible reaction from your side in the case of a lack of respect is to react promptly, calling her on her lack of respect.
There are no other ways if you don't want to be changed into a beta.
I have noticed that many modern men, unfortunately, have become so insecure and passive that they are not even able to recognize a lack of respect on the part of a woman.
The tragic truth hidden in this passive behavior is that these men have completely lost contact with their value.
You have to practice recognizing the lack of respect and reacting to it properly because, if you don't, your relationship with that woman will sooner or later go into a bad state of crisis.
If a woman says to you:
"Bring me some coffee from the kitchen!" with an arrogant and authoritative tone, the only logical reaction must be - without anger but firmly - "Who taught you to speak in such an impolite manner? If I had been your teacher I would surely have spanked you!" and of course, you don't bring her the coffee, even if she were to cry forever.
Many women test in that manner your capacity of being a real man fighting for your own interests. If you give her the possibility of not respecting you, your relationship with her is already ruined from the beginning. You will never be able to seduce her.
Or if you are in a relationship with her, her sexual interest for you will suffer a decline and then it will disappear completely.
You must practice challenging her systematically:
1. on manipulation attempts.
2. on the lack of respect.
3. on inaccuracies, unilateral interpretations, any attitude which are not simple, direct and sincere.
4. Any attempts to make you make a choice which is against your interests.
Don't worry about her complaints: when she realizes that you are a hard nut to crack, she won't believe her eyes and ears - she will think, feel inside her "God, finally a real man!" - She will feel a very strong erotic attraction for you but she will nevertheless try in a continuous, repetitive fashion to go through your defenses anyway.
Your mental attitude when you challenge her on her behavior must be this: don't get angry, keep yourself calm, feel it as a game. Use sarcasm or humor or both. If you put yourself into the mental state of that being in a game, you will begin to enjoy it and it will become your second nature.
If you put yourself into the mental state that calling her on her manipulations and lacks of respect is a game, you will enjoy it the same way you enjoy playing football or billiards.
At the same time you will make her sexual interest rocket sky-high.
3. Inducing guilt. To induce guilt all the time is a means used by a woman to control a man and it is also a test. It is like an active attempt to put you in a subservient mental state.
There is only one rational and effective way of reacting: don't allow her to have you feeling guilty about something you are not guilty of.
She: "Men can't talk about feelings.'"
He (expert seducer): "I am not a man. I am an animal, come here, I want to bite your neck."
She (despite the fact he is now wearing the last Versace fashion): "What on earth are you wearing? Don't tell me you are coming to the cinema dressed that way?"
He (expert seducer, impudently): "Come on; don't tell me we have to undress right away? We've just met!"
Making you feel guilty is surely the worst among all the tests and control means women use. It is practically impossible to be in a relationship for very long with a woman who uses this means of control all the time without getting pissed off at her.
If she continues as above every day, yes take her to bed, but dump her later.
Nobody can endure feeling guilty for a prolonged period of time without getting sick both physically and psychologically, particularly if the stimulus is chronic. I am personally convinced that this is one of the causes of early deaths for many husbands.
Even if she were be the most beautiful woman in the world, by making you feel guilty she can reduce you, psychologically, to feeling like a wet rag.
Start therefore on the basis of the above rules to train yourself to react properly to manipulation, lack of respect and attempts to induce a feeling of guilt in you.
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